Griffin Family: 2008

Saturday, June 7, 2008

jack

jude

the moment when jack comes home each day

jude singing songs

a hug from a friend

encouraging words

a long walk - long being the operative word because i feel really slow these days

thinking about my new son

coke

just the right song

quiet

Thursday, May 1, 2008

waiting and wondering

So, Jack and I have been trying to sell our house for 13 months now. Before you jump to any conclusions, you have to know that we live in a nice house that is updated and cute and really great. (Some assume that it hasn't sold because it's in such poor condition). Anyhow, I guess my need to clarify explains some of the reason I'm even writing. This has been such a frustrating process. We have had over 50 showings and I have learned that I take every comment about my home very personally - the majority of which I can do NOTHING about.

1. don't like the shared driveway
2. don't like the elementary school across the street
3. don't like the condos down the road
4. doesn't have a basement
5. the kitchen tile is too textured

I could go on.

So, tonight we're waiting on an offer. I have prayed about this for months and really want to believe that God is going to provide an offer that is reasonable and will give us enough money to put a good amount towards a new house. But, the doubts and fears are a little bit too close. It makes it really hard to believe that He would actually do that. I worry that some horrible thing will come up during the inspection and the buyer will think we haven't taken care of our house. Again, I take it all so personally. And I wonder why. Why do I feel like comments made about my house and my neighborhood are a personal attack on me. I should KNOW that I am not defined by the house that I live in, but I struggle on so many levels with caring too much about how people see me. Am I performing well, am I a good friend, am I pretty enough, and apparently, do you approve of my house?

I don't have any solutions. It is a day by day battle for me. I know that I must keep reminding myself that God's view of me is the only one that matters. So, why is that so hard?